After The Work

Walking in sand can provide a variety of tactile sensations. Sand can feel cool underfoot, soothing to shuffle your feet through. Sand can be firm when you walk closer to the water, elsewhere we sink down a bit when we walk. Sand can also be hot, scorching to the feet, causing us to run towards the shade or the waters. Walking up a sand dune is another experience all together; it can feel like an exercise in futility. One step up, second step, then slide one step down. Depending on where you are walking, you feel as if you are standing still, left exhausted looking up at the heights you cannot seem to reach.

Life can seriously feel this way, making a step, falling back a step, looking up at heights that seem unreachable. We feel like quitting, that we do not have the capacity to climb those heights, destined to stay in one place. Life can be exhausting as well, making headway in our budget only to have the car break down again. Or we can begin to feel better about ourselves, only to fall into old habits, set backs, and old narratives about ourselves.

The spiritual life can have many paradoxes, one relevant to walking up sand is to turn our sufferings into glory. If our suffering has anything positive, it may be to move us forward. It calls us to self-examination and can drive us to our knees in prayer. It can produce the spiritual muscle needed to continue walking, if channeled positively. Our suffering can have meaning, a meaning we find through self-examination and getting wise counsel.

Romans 5:3-5 tells us “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” Continuing to walk each day gives us perseverance, but it calls us to walk through our fears, delusions, pain, and anger–only to keep going, step by step.

Eventually our character improves. We are shaped by our experience, especially our suffering. Much like iron being shaped in a forge, life can beat our the impurities that exist in our hearts. We look back and see our progress, how far we have come and it gives us hope. “Perhaps I can do it, I have did it before” we may say. The evidence of spiritual work has its own way of convicting us we should keep going. There will be days of set back, days we are sliding down again, but keep going. Even if it hurts, this too will pass. We begin to have hope.

Our shameful mistakes take on meaning. We won’t repeat them as we are not the same person anymore. We will work to make them right, at least have the willingness to do so. We live in Blessed Serenity, walking in the Love of God. Life begins to be easier, things begin to work out again. Instead of looking for confirmation of our negative thoughts, we find the world is a little more bright. Confirmation bias gets turned on its head; before we could only see our mistakes and faults reflected in life. Now we see our lives are brighter, our joys and gratitude reflected back to us.

Continue to climb! Don’t give up. The story is not over yet, nor has the ending been written. The sand may be hot and the journey up make take some time. If you feel stuck, go back to the fundamentals. Pray for strength. Start again if need be, asking God for forgiveness again. Seek to make things right, even if the distance seems to great. God will bring us along according to his plan, even if his plan seems unfair or unclear. Faith helps our perseverance in life leads to better character, hope, and love.